This is a public service announcement to the gamers of the world. Beware! GTA V is upon us and there is no turning back!

Thank You,

Greg J Allman.

 

“It’s clear where you’re priorities lie Kyle, I’ve had enough.”

“Sandra please, just let me explain.”

“Explain what Kyle that you’re a thoughtless, mindless pig of a man!”

“Well yeah, but I love you.”

“Well it’s too late for that now, goodbye Kyle. Try not to waste life playing these games forever.” Sandra slammed the front door. He sure was going to miss her. He sat on the top step and listened as the car sped off. This had been what he’d been crying out for all day. Now that he had it, he wished he could trade it in.

 

Kyle was a sensible man; nine times out of ten he did the right thing. He treated his girlfriend well and they’d had a loving relationship for over two years now. But he had a weakness, just like every man. Kyle did his utmost to fight against it. But tonight he was surrendering to its ultimate power. He couldn’t fight it anymore. Nor did he want to.

 

 

“Well you don’t have a fever” Sandra placed her palm on his forehead.

“It’s my stomach. I’m sure it was that place last night.” Kyle moaned.

“Gary gave it rave reviews babe, it couldn’t have been there.”

“Oh yeah Gary knows all, all bow down to Gary.”

“Kyle stop. You sound like a petulant child” her voice was firm.

“I’m actually a very sick child, who would like to be excused from tonight’s dinner party.”

“But it’s my birthday Ky, I really want you to be there” Sandra cried.

“And I will be, after the dinner party. I’ll be accompanyin’ my princess to the ball” Kyle smiled. His cheek always served him well with Sandra.

“Hmm, you better not be pullin’ a fast one on me Kyle” she warned.

“I’m not” he surrendered his hands.

“My colleagues were lookin’ forward to meetin’ you at this.”

“Tell them I will see them at the after party. Champagne’s on me.”

 

Kyle got out of the bed and took a hold of Sandra. Tonight was her special night. Her 21st birthday, and she wanted to make sure the proceedings went off without a hitch. Kyle knew how important tonight was to her. It was all she spoke about when they went out for dinner the night before. Kyle was never fond of Lebanese and that was confirmed when he woke up with the toilet for company this morning. Sandra’s supervisor and all round creep Gary had suggested. Kyle had met him once before, although he claimed to be married no-one had ever met his wife. Plus he was a very tactile person, especially at social events. He’s the balding man in a silk white shirt at parties casually resting his palm on someone half his age’s waist.

“You promise you’re comin’ out after.”

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world babe. You know that” Kyle reassured her.

“Ok, make sure you take some medicine before you leave. You’re shirt’s ironed, so is the suit” Sandra pointed over at his wardrobe.

“Ok.”

“Make sure you do that top button up as well. I don’t wanna see you lookin’ like you’ve come out the office” Sandra moaned.

“No babe, course not.”

“Ok, oh yeah, shoes not trainers I know what you’re like and.”

“Darlin’ get a move on, you’re gonna keep everyone waitin’” Kyle interrupted.

Sandra smiled before becoming teary eyed. “I love you so much Kyle.”

“I love you to babe. Now go on, knock ‘em dead.”

Sandra skipped out of the room and hustled down the stairs. Kyle waited by his bedroom door until he heard the front door close. He hurried to his window and saw Sandra get in Gary’s car with a load of her colleagues and speed off.

 

Kyle leapt in to the air with admiration and joy. Tonight hadn’t only been an important night for Sandra; it was an important night for Kyle too. He thought he carried his plan out perfectly faking a sickness from last night’s restaurant but it only kept Sandra at his side all day. Until now. Kyle’s day officially started at 9:05AM when the postman delivered a package for him. He wasted little time opening it and unveiling its contents. GTA V. He had marked this day on his calendar for months, and finally at 18:57 he was able to get the game underway. All night his imagination ran wild over all the in game action he would be experiencing. Parachuting out of aeroplanes, robbing banks and stealing cars, nothing and no-one was going to put a stop to this, he had waited too long. He switched on his XBOX and slotted the game in the disc tray. Kyle could feel his blood pumping under his skin. His mobile vibrated on his bed, he checked the screen. Sandra sent him a smiley face message. He threw his phone back on the bed. His screen lit up showing the opening credits to the game. Kyle selected which character he wanted to start with. It was a tossup between Michael the middle aged gangster going through a mid life crisis or Franklin, the gangbanger. He went with Michael. The opening credits to Michael’s scenario began, Kyle’s eyes were glued to the television, he reached over for his remote and cranked up the volume. His mobile vibrated, he felt around his bed before putting his hand on it. Another message, this time asking where he is, he messaged back in bed with a thousand kisses. He was sick of the interruptions; he was missing important plot points to the game.

 

Finally the actual game play started he was in the middle of a bank robbery with Michael’s character. His hands were shaking in excitement; the realism of the world created in this game was astonishing. Kyle had never seen anything like it. This was better than any birthday dinner, even better than sex with the woman he loved. Nothing beat GTA V on a quiet evening in. Kyle became so lost in the game that he didn’t hear the tyres screeching outside his home, or the front door opening and slamming shut. He didn’t hear the footsteps hurrying up the stairs and he certainly didn’t hear his bedroom door open.

“What on Earth are you playin’ at?”

“Huh” Kyle dropped the controller in shock.

“You said you were sick, you lyin’ bastard!” Sandra screamed.

“No, I am really. I just thought”

“Oh save it Kyle.” She reached over to the bed and picked up her phone. “I left it here” she said holding it up.

“Babe, I’ll get dressed I’ll come to dinner” Kyle moaned.

“No Kyle, just leave me alone.”

Footsteps thundered on the stairs and Gary emerged at the doorway.

“Ay up Kyle! Heard you weren’t feelin’ too clever.”

“Oh he’s fine, he just wanted to stay in and play his video games. Instead of celebrating my 21st. What a man eh” Sandra’s words cut him deep.

“Video games? How old are you now mate?” Gary asked.

Kyle let out a sigh “Gary can you leave us please.”

Gary tapped his watch at Sandra angering Kyle even more.

“Gary please, get out.”

“Ok, calm down Kylie boy.”

“Don’t speak to Gary that way” Sandra defended him. “Anyway we’re leavin’ now. Don’t bother turnin’ up later.” Sandra followed Gary down the stairs. Kyle stood at the top of the stairs in his pyjama bottoms.

“Sandra please, just wait.”

Gary disappeared out the front door. Sandra stood on the door step and looked back at Gary. Her mascara was running from the tears.

“It’s clear where you’re priorities lie Kyle, I’ve had enough.”

“Sandra please, just let me explain.”

“Explain what Kyle that you’re a thoughtless, mindless pig of a man!”

“Well yeah, but I love you.”

“Well it’s too late for that now, goodbye Kyle. Try not to waste life playing these games forever.”

 

The End is Nigh.

The End is Nigh.

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